Cookies and Butt Shoes

Sorry I have been a deadbeat bride blogger, I was really busy passing two, YES TWO! Kidney stones this past week. I am working on being on the mend, but one of the side effects of my narcotic induced stuper is the sweet tooth from hell, which I rarely remember. Apparently, I went on an ice cream and cookie feeding frenzy, which I fail to recollect. If I don't remember shoving food into my mouth, did it really happen? Oh, I am sure that a jury of my peers would agree that I am guilty as charged of being a weak, diet cheater. I mean, that guy on CSI murdered his wife whilst sleep walking and didn't remember (SO guilty), so I am sure that my sleep/vicodin induced binge eating is the same...so here I am, guilty as charged. Convicted Fat-Felon.

Needless to say I spent the last week of life laying around, moaning, and chugging enough water fill up Shamoo's tank. This means I feel waterbloated, lazy, and fatty fat fat. The GOOD news is they're here. My butt shoes. I cannot wait to put these babies to the test. I wore them twice, no result as of yet...but I am sure that has something to do with my Gluttonous Cookie Craving Behavior. I will wear the shit out of them this week and will send out a report as needed. The good news is, they look really cool.

In wedding planning news, I hired a planner. For reals ya'll. I want to be in a state of bridal bliss being pampered and ignorant to the fact that the florist is late, or that someone took their 400 pound dog for a walk on the site that morning and left a wedding "gift", or that there was any issue ever during the whole day. These are things I will not be worried about. Matt is the most supportive about hiring Sandy, he just wants me to be a cool, calm, and collected Meggie on the big day. We ALL know this is never going to happen unless I am shot with a tranquilizer gun...but we can pretend that it will.

Also, we have a cake stand. Leaps and Bounds in the planning department I know, but really, where else does a fat bride start?