I went to David's Bridal for an "educational experience". I'm pretty sure this is Hell on Earth. I found out the following.
My size is in between double digits and Lane Bryant.
Tulle is NOT my friend.
Lace with iridescent sequins does not make me look like a mermaid...but more like one of those bloated marlins that has been laying on the dock for too long.
Lace with iridescent sequins HURTS.
The bigger the skirt...the bigger your ass.
I do not like having to back in and out of doorways because my dress needs a WIDE LOAD sticker on it.
I have fresh romaine lettuce and spinach from my garden. I have no excuse not to eat a salad. Except that there is chips and salsa that I would much rather be eating....
I had a birthday caramel and pecan cinnamon roll for breakfast today. I walked 12 blocks for it. I'm not sure if this cancels out the pecan carmel cinnamon roll or if it just shows my extreme addiction to pastry.
It's probably the latter.
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